


Self Control

by OutOfVein



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Depression, Hurt/Comfort, Loneliness, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, Self-deprecating humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-09 13:32:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11670126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OutOfVein/pseuds/OutOfVein
Summary: Two nights and half a day with Robert, getting wasted, wasting time, clubbing, searching for cryptids, doing anything to ignore the soul crushing loneliness in their hearts.





	1. Chapter 1

 “Let's have a toast” Clancy words slurred, he raised his glass with little enthusiasm, but with twice the effort just to keep it on his hand.

“For what?” Mary asked, leaning her head on her hand, her cheek pulled up in a comical display of boredom.

Across the table, Robert sat with his arms crossed with the same eyes as his two companions, heavy with boredom and sadness. Clancy glanced at the old fashioned glass, realizing he didn't think it through.

“For... miraculously not dying of alcohol poisoning yet,” He said with a cynical smile.

“Yeah...” Mary muttered, “I suppose I can toast to that.”

Their glassed clinked miserably and they finished what little was left of the whiskey.

“I'll go get another round,” Clancy said, taking their glasses and leaving the booth.

They were at their third bar of the night, the crowd at Jim and Kim's was too loud and obnoxious, the second bar kicked them out after Robert got into a fight with a group of men calling Mary a bitch, both him and Clancy scored at least a couple of bruises.

So they went down by the river on the more... lowbrow part of the town to a stuffy, barely lit hole. The fine aroma of mold and asbestos permeated on the nose, the crowd would kick your ass if you as much as bumped them, the glasses weren't that clean, but the music was damn good and the drinks damn strong.

Clancy watched the bartender pouring a fluorescent green liquid that dazed him for second. That would sure lift some spirits. He got back to their booth with three shot glasses of the dreadful beverage and a mischievous grin on his lips.

“Wow,” Mary chuckled, boosting Clancy's ego that starved for his “alcoholic seniors” acceptance, “So much for that toast.”

“Are you guys down, or am I going to talk to the green fairies by myself?”

“What have we done to you sweetheart?” Mary laughed.

The trio -even Robert- took their glasses with hesitation. He was the first to take it, the nasty look on his face had Clancy having second thoughts. Mary was next, she took it quickly, slamming the glass down, leaning her face against the table for a moment.

“Whoa, Mary, you cool?” Clancy held a hand on her back.

She raised her head, blinking several times and turned to him, “C'mon, cupcake, where's your bravado now?” She manage to say with a croaky voice.

Clancy started slow, the foul taste and smell burned through his head like molten so he flipped the glass at once. He saw green, the space he occupied, the couch, the stagnated air, they were all one and whole, everything heavy and light at the same time. Robert's dumb grin twisted in a downward spiral and Clancy was thrown back against the seat, Mary laughed maniacally next to him. And then as Cher's Believe started playing, in a bar like that, that's when he knew he had lost it.

Except they were not at the bar anymore.

He watched Robert under a pulsating blue and green light, bobbing his head, eyes shut tight like he was focusing on a hard task, his teeth gnawing on his lips, hips swaying ever so slightly, the leather jacket tied around his waist, sleeves rolled up showing his muscular arms, glistening with sweat like a disco ball. Mary was next to him, throwing her arms up, lip-syncing to the song like a religious verse on Sunday church, her sweater wrapped around her neck.

Clancy looked down at himself, shirtless, his body moving on it's own accord. That song, that damn chorus pulled him back in a trance before self-consciousness could set in.

Mary got in between them as they pressed tightly against her. It felt weird, kinda embarrassing, he wanted to laugh, laugh until tears come out, but that would be something he would do once he regained control of his body. He let himself go, lightweight and light-hearted, the bassdrum matched his heartbeat, the soundwaves physically touched his skin.

Mary leaned her head back on his shoulder, while pressing her body against Robert with an arm around his neck. Robert was on his own universe, eyes still closed, his hands pressed against Mary's waist. Clancy felt his own hands reach out and grab Robert's blazing arms. Mary sang the bridge with a wide smile on her face, sweat dripping down her forehead, sticking on her messed up hair, for once she looked free and careless. Clancy pressed his lips against her neck, he held her tighter, her hand ran along his arm to Robert's arm like they were one.

“What's our age again?” Clancy laughed at the thought. His own daughter, at college, was probably behaving better than him, probably in bed, eating some pudding, working on a project. He at least hoped.

Whatever club they were at, however, knew their age damn well, as some 80's classic started playing and kept their high going. The people around looked as spaced out as they did, dancing wildly, Clancy couldn't tell if they were younger, it didn't matter, no one was judging.

His eyes met Robert's. Clancy couldn't quite read them - he never did -but they left him enthralled, he grasped at the man's tanned arms harder, begging him not to let go. Time seemed to slow down, his surroundings fading out. Heclosed his eyes, Robert's predatory gaze etched in his eyelids “If there is anything I will remember from this night, please let it be this”.

Clancy woke up to find himself leaned against a wall, sitting on the pavement under a streetlight. Robert crouched beside him, lighting a cigarette. Mary before them, mumbling the words of a Blondie song, dancing like she was still at the dancefloor.

In his hand a brown sack with a bottle inside, “Why am I still drinking?”

“Never ask yourself that while you're still drunk,” Robert offered him the cigarette and he accepted it more eagerly than expected. The smoke scorched his lungs, “Oh yeah, that's why I quit.” He coughed it out, handing the cigarette back to Robert and offered his bottle.

The man took a long swig, shook the bottle and tossed it on the curb, his friends cringed and whined at the abrasive noise.

“Let's go,” Robert ordered, struggling to keep his balance as he stood up. Clancy raised a hand, Robert smirked at his friend, resembling a drunk beggar asking for change, and reached out to pull him up. Clancy stumbled in a very cheesy and cliché way on Robert's unprepared embrace.

Mary laughed, “Very subtle, darling.”

“I'm too wasted for subtle,” Clancy grinned and ran a hand to squeeze Robert's ass.

Surprisingly, the man laughed and wrapped his arms around him.

“Oh wow, I have my shirt back, good to know,” Clancy joked, looking down at his red - “wait that's not mine.” He glanced Robert's bare chest under the leather jacket, “Well, I really liked that shirt, but I guess that's worth the loss.” His hand ran over the muscular torso. A dopey smile on his face.

“We really corrupted his innocent soul,” Mary slurred like she was trying to keep from bursting out laughing at any time.

“I'm starting to think he was never innocent at all.” Robert replied as Clancy took advantage of their position to grope him as much as he could, giggling like a schoolgirl.

“Well, boys, the night's still young. Where to next?”

They strolled down the street, no destination in mind, all three of them struggling to walk straight, but Clancy was the only one that didn't – or couldn't – try to hide it, he squeezed himself between the walls and Robert for balance.

“What is this awful taste in my mouth?” Clancy spat on a patch of grass.

“You threw up, dear,” Mary answered in a wicked motherly tone.

“Oh...”

Met with the gracious sight of an open Mexican food stand, they each bought a tightly wrapped burrito and sat at the curb to eat. Clancy felt a bit self-conscious when a group of kids half his age showed up to do the same. His companions didn't seem to care.

“Look at us still standing, what time is it anyway?” His chuckle was met with silence.

He looked up at the blank void of the night sky, breathing in the air that felt clearer and lighter than it ever did before, the cold spreading in his lungs a welcome relief. Clancy found himself attracted to the ground as an overwhelmingly weakness fell upon his limbs.

He saw himself from above, looking down at the body sprawled on concrete, the fillings of the burrito over his -Robert's - shirt and realized “I think I drank too much”. Oh no, what if the Youths were watching? How embarrassing.

Robert pulled his limp body over his lap and poured water on his lips. “C'mon buddy, what about that toast of yours?”

“That's sweet”, Clancy thought, the two cuddling like lovers on a picnic. “Wish I could say something if I wasn't dying right now.”

He returned back to himself after a while, the first thing he noticed was the wasted burrito on the ground, then the warmth Robert emanated behind him.

“Clancy?” Robert asked in the sweetest tone Clancy ever heard from him.

“Hmm?” He leaned his head against Robert's warm chest.

“Don't scare me like that again, okay?”

Clancy swooned. Was he dead? Was this really Robert talking? Or just a figment of the last moments of his imagination? “Sure thing, dearest.” He smiled and closed his eyes.

All the technological advances can never beat alcohol's teleportation powers. Clancy found himself sitting at a new bar, a little cozier than the last one in that it didn't stink of poison. He held on to Robert's arms like a koala, his eyes struggling to stay open. “Where's Mary?”

“On the prowl,” Robert answered, taking his arm away from Clancy's death grip to wrap it around him and pull him closer.

Clancy purred, his hand sneaking under Robert's closed jacket and nesting his face on the crook of the man's neck, the tip of his tongue licking the salty sweat. Robert kept his cool, fingers threading Clancy's scruffy hair.

“Hey, Rob,” Clancy mumbled against his skin, the man muttered something, “Thanks for taking me out, things have been rather empty without Amanda in the house,” He confessed, “Miserable, actually.”

His companion pressed a tall glass against his lips. “C'mon, you need more water,” Robert ordered.

Clancy took slow sips, Robert patiently waiting, “You are so sweet.” He smiled, his eyes felt impossible to open, all his weight fell on his partner.

“He doesn't look good.” Said Mary's voice.

“He is fine,” Robert reassured, “He drank enough water.”

“Should we call an ambulance?”

“I'm fine, mom”

“Anyways,” She rolled her eyes, “This place is a bore, let's go.”

The pavement felt like tar. Clancy had an arm around Robert, holding onto him at every misstep. Opening his eyes was out of question, seeing double an understatement. Without a moment's notice, he stopped, threw himself against an iron fence and let his guts out, over Robert's shirt, his pants, shoes, everywhere.

“There, there, kid, let it all out.” Mary patted his back as he hurled boiling acid out of his stomach and liver.

“Kid?” He asked between barfs, “How old do you think I am?”

“Right now you look 18."

“C'mon Mary, don't be so rough on him.”

She laughed, “I'm not, he is a trooper.”

“There's a gas station there, I'll get something to eat.”

Clancy sat on the cool floor under the payphones outside the gas station, Mary crouched next to him, watching over him with a twisted proud grin.“You stink,” She remarked with strange fondness.

In the horizon, beyond the houses and the highway, the sun began to rise. Birds began to chirp, their high-pitched tweets like sharp little tacks on Clancy's brain.

Robert returned a bit later with a bottle of water and glowing orange nachos topped with glowing orange cheddar. Clancy stomach's churned at the smell, he whined a warning to evacuate his proximity and leaned over, gagging twice to force something that never came. He stared at the nachos, his stomach said “no”, but his mind, his mind was telling him “yes”. He picked the cheesiest one he could find and hummed with delight as the strong, foul, chemically constructed triangle contaminated his mouth.

The trio huddled around the plate of nachos like a bunch of monkeys discovering a new future icon.

“My throat feels like what a corroded pipe looks,” Clancy laughed loudly, sickly and hoarse. His companions looked at him sprawled on the ground in a mix of amusement and worry, before the contagious laughter began to spread. It died out into comfortable silence, around them the city began to wake up, the first sights of early risers on their way to start a new day. A car parked by the fuel tanks, a man in a tight suit argued on the phone and stopped to throw them a look of disgust.

Robert took a swig of the water before handing the bottle to Clancy “I don't think I can ever live that way”. Clancy and Mary hummed in agreement.

“This is a much better way to feel like shit,” Clancy joked, earning a couple of laughs. “Ah, damn. I'm supposed to go running with Craig today.” Clancy groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose while slowly falling to the ground.

“Why do you even bother?” She asked.

“Craig is cool, and it feels nice to say 'at least I'm trying' when Amanda calls, gotta keep up the appearances I guess.”

“You can fool anyone with that cute face.”

“My face is not cute, look at this jaw, you can cut someone with this.”

They both laughed. Robert studied him with that impossible to read look.

“You think he is cute, Rob?” Mary teased.

Clancy's eyes were wide like a child showing their parents something they made. Robert chuckled, “Yeah, he is kinda adorable,” He tried sounding as cool as he could while looking at the cheeky smile on his friend's face. For a moment they felt like teenagers, back at a time when everything was a bit less shitty.

The first honk of the day jolted them awake.

“Ugh, time to go home,” Mary groaned, her bones cracking as she stood up.

“Where are we anyway?” Clancy look around.

“I'll ask the cashier,” she replied, limping her way to the store.

Robert looked at Clancy, lying down on the pavement like a bum. The sun formed a line that approached them slowly from above, their surroundings growing softer than the abrasive fluorescent lights.

“Hey Rob.” The man called.

“What?”

“Can I keep your shirt?”

“No.”

“But I barfed all over it,” Clancy whined.

“Wash it and give it back.”

“Is it the only one you got?”

“No, but I like it.”

“Fine, it's not like it smells like you anymore.”

They stared at each other, watching their cheeks glow red.

Mary came back, “We are not that far, but if anyone has money for cab, please come forward.”

The men stood still.

“Really?”

“Hey, I bought the nachos.”

“I think I blew it all on that absinthe.”

She shook her her head, “Let's go you bums.”

The walk back to the cul-de-sac was a dreadful mixture of pains; knees, backs, heads, all threatening to collapse at any moment. People walked by throwing them foul glances, a cop car that slowed down and blatantly scanned them head to toes, Clancy had to hold Robert's arms to keep him from flipping them off .

Before reaching her house, Mary took Robert by the arm and whispered something in his ear, the man looked at Clancy looking back at them with apprehension. She left them with a mischievous grin before trying her best to stop stumbling.

“Hey, man.”

Clancy looked over to see Craig approaching them, on his fitness outfit, River settled on his torso as always, her round eyes blinking twice before she fell back to sleep.

“Hey Craig,” Clancy cheered, “oh, sorry River.” He placed a finger over his mouth and shushed himself.

“I left you a message, but you didn't answer.” Craig said, eyes darting between Robert, Clancy and the vomit over his clothes.

“Yeah, sorry about that, I was doing, uh... A different kind of endurance run,” Clancy giggled like an idiot at his own joke.

Craig glanced at Robert staring back with a mean, impatient scowl.

“I'll see you Wednesday at the gym, gotta work on those scrawny legs, am I right?” Clancy smiled.

“Sure thing, man.” Craig replied, scratching the back of his neck.

A moment of self consciousness struck Clancy with disgust as if even River's sleepy eyes were judging him.

“Take care, okay?” Craig's voice was full of worry, with one last accusing glance at Robert, he returned to his jog.

“You too buddy.”

They stopped before Robert's house, the man kept the grip on Clancy's arm.

“You should come in.”

“Oh.” Clancy let out a nervous chuckle, “You know I'm going to disintegrate completely the second I sit down?”

“Gotta make sure you get yourself back together later.”

Clancy smiled, “I'm okay, really.”

Robert ignored and pulled the man towards the door.

“I'm covered in puke, Rob.” Clancy complained, “Lay me down wherever.”

Robert pulled his shirt off his partner and threw it to a corner, damn he reeked.

“Hey there, sailor.” Clancy chuckled, barely able to stand still. He giggled when thrown on the bed, wiggling to let Robert take off the rest of his clothes. “Oh boy, how am I still awake?” He laughed, “I'm putting every 20 years old to shame right now.”

Robert sat next to him and undressed to his boxers. Clancy gathered all the energy he had left and threw himself against the man, knocking him down and wrapping himself around him. The rise and fall of Robert's chest lulled him to sleep.

 


	2. Chapter 2

“Clancy.” He heard the call of that husky voice he loved so much.

“Hmm?”

“Wake up.”

“Five more minutes...”

“You said that five minutes ago.”

Trying to change Robert's mind, Clancy embraced the man tighter.

“Clancy.”

“Has it been five minutes?”

“Yes.”

“Liar.”

Robert easily pushed him aside. Upset, Clancy rolled himself off the bed, his body crashed on the floor with a loud thump.

“I'm not falling for that, drama queen,” He stood above the childish man with his hands on his hips.

From that angle, with Robert towering half-naked above him, Clancy started having impure thoughts.

“Stop looking at me like that,” Robert demanded.

“Like what?” Clancy kept staring at the bulge in Robert's boxers.

Robert grunted, “I need a shower and something to eat.”

“Can I join?”

Robert halted and looked over his shoulders at the man sitting half-naked beside his bed. The look on his face alerted Clancy's fight or flight instincts, blood rushed out of his brain to somewhere way below. Robert didn't have to say anything, Clancy followed him to the bathroom like a lost puppy.

The shower was... an actual shower, as the two found out they were too sore and hungover to actually do something besides a few gropes, humps and kisses. Clancy had no idea where they were in terms of a relationship and Robert wasn't the kind of guy that liked to talk about it openly – or anything involving emotions – at all, but it didn't matter, what they had was beyond fine.

“I need a huge slice of pizza right now,” Clancy said while drying his hair, “Do you wanna order it or go somewhere?

Robert's eyes were fixated at the mirror like, if for a brief moment, he didn't recognized the man in the reflection. He looked sickly, those malfunctioning buzzing lights above the mirror didn't flatter anyone though.

“Do you want me to leave?” Clancy asked. Carefully, he reached out to touch the man's arm. The buzzing noise really drilling in his ears.

Robert snapped awake, he looked scared and vulnerable for a split second, eyes wide like he was caught doing something private. Clancy decided not to say anything, his thumb caressed Robert's skin, reassuring. The man brushed him aside and left the room to gather whatever piece of clothing he could find.

“Oh man, Betsy must be starving,” Clancy shouted.

“Already fed her.”

“When?”

“On those ten more minutes I let you sleep.”

“Aww, ain't you a sweetheart?” Clancy cooed, “Wait a moment, you were cuddling me all the time.”

Robert turned his back to put on a shirt.

“Rob.” Clancy teased, but Robert kept turning his back to him, “Did you come back to bed to cuddle with me?”

Robert avoided him by looking for a clean pair of socks around the mess on the floor, Clancy's giggling made the search even more desperate. Robert shut him up by throwing a shirt on his face.

“I want both shirts back washed by tomorrow,” He ordered.

“They will be the only clean shirts you have,” Clancy mocked.

They ordered a half pinneaple, half flaming tuna, and sat on the couch with Betsy hopping from lap to lap. The TV filled their silence with a reality show about crossfitters competing on how many people they could convince to do crossfit in less than an hour. Clancy dozed off, the bell ring waking him up moments later.

“What time is it anyway?” He looked out of the window and took the last bite of his last slice, it did not settle right in his stomach. Robert slurped the cheesy pizza instead of answering. “I should go home and check if everything is okay,” Clancy said, making no attempts to get up.

Minutes later, when a jingle on the TV was too much to bear, Clancy flopped his body like a fish and jolted off the couch.

“Hit me up if wanna go out tonight.” Clancy made his way to the door, grabbed the foul red shirt from the floor and left without a word from Robert, as expected.

He closed his front door behind him, “I'm home!” His voice echoed back, he looked around, the place was spotless, exactly as he left it the night before. Clancy suddenly understood why Robert never cleaned his mess.

He sat down, twiddling his thumbs. It felt like one of those sequences in movies where time lapses around the characters while he tried doing any chores around the house to sooth the static noise in his head that kept growing louder and louder.

Jolted awake by the sweet toy piano of an ice-cream van and children shouting, time halted like someone just pressed pause on the cloud. He felt the whiplash, his hand grasped at his chest. Clancy was assaulted by an overwhelming heaviness in his heart that could be mistook for a cardiac arrest, unfortunately it was a common feeling for him; the crushing physical pain of loneliness.

Overwhelmed, Clancy made his way to the laundry room and tossed Robert's shirts in the washing machine along with the three other articles of clothing he had been using for weeks. With his phone in hand, he collapsed on the cold linoleum floor. The room turned blue, the cyclical noise of the washing machine hypnotizing him into non-existence.

8:45PM Clancy found himself covered by the clothes he had just washed and dried. His phone beeped, the screen a beacon of light in the dark room.

A message from Robert, “I'm outside.”

He got dressed right at the spot and, with Robert's shirts, left the house.

The man stood by his truck, smoking a cigarette. Clancy tossed him his shirt, he removed his jacket and put the red shirt back on.

“Wow, and I thought I was repeating my outfits.”

They got in the car and drove silently up the hill. Clancy already knew where they were heading and it broke his heart that he wasn't nearly as excited as he was at their first time.

God, he felt nothing at all.

“I collapsed on the laundry room floor,” Clancy blurted, “I think I might be getting into a very bad depressive episode, just thought you should know.”

He didn't know where that forwardness came from. Clancy leaned towards the door, their windows were open and the cool breeze was comforting. Robert kept driving with a straight face, eyes focused on the road, he looked absolutely stunning in the cool blue light of dusk.

“What do you want me to say to that?” Robert finally spoke.

“Nothing...”

And he did say nothing. They arrived at their usual spot, Clancy watched Robert search for a nice piece of wood that he began to whittle.

“Look, I'm...” Robert carved too hard and snapped the stick in half, but kept at it anyway, “I'm not good with shit like that...” He sighed and stopped, “But I'm here for you, if you need me.”

Clancy felt tears forming, he smiled effortlessly, “Thank you, and you know I'm here if you need me too.” He leaned to kiss the man on the cheek.

Robert's smile was soft, but genuine,“There is some beer in the truck.”

They settled on the trunk of the truck, drinking the beer, watching the city sleep and the moon swimming in the ocean on the horizon. Away from the city, Clancy could see the stars. The cool sea breeze gave him goosebumps.

“It might sound stupid, but I fell younger when I'm with you,” Clancy confessed, he wanted to say more, but nothing came to mind, so he took a sip of his beer.

Robert wrapped an arm around him and pulled him to a slow and passionate kiss, Clancy closed his eyes and let the man lead, they kissed until they ran out of breath, foreheads touching and panting softly. Clancy leaned on his shoulder and pulled his partner to a full embrace, Robert's cologne reminded him of a lit fireplace on a snowy night.

Minutes passed, Clancy quietly broke their embrace, chuckling awkwardly. Robert whittled for a while before tossing his carving away with a grunt. He jumped off of the trunk and Clancy followed.

“I feel a lot better now, thanks,” Clancy said, leaned against the door, his head out of the window feeling the fresh air clean his lungs.

“Let's get a drink,” Robert decided, it did disappoint Clancy a bit, knowing that neither of them could go a night without something strong to put them to sleep, with so many horrible thoughts the idea of laying with insomnia terrified them.

The air of Jim and Kim's was of leather and gin, Clancy's lungs felt heavier then back in the hill. Scanning the bar, he felt terrible for feeling glad Mary wasn't there. He liked her immensely, far more than he ever thought he would, but no way he could go for another rager.

At least he liked to think he couldn't.

Aware that the spur of good mood surely wasn't going to last long, Clancy didn't take his drinking too seriously, much to Robert's dismay, he started with a long island ice tea that earned a long groan from the disgruntled man, then an old fashioned trying to get the street respect back, a white russian to get a bump, a shot of tequila and a piña colada because the song started playing and he had to take the piss out of Robert.

“Why do you even do those here?” Robert yelled at Neil who shrugged with a malicious smile.

Clancy tried – he really did – to keep water breaks, but midway through it slipped through his mind. He found himself puking on the restroom later and dismissed the incident with a shot of whiskey during last call. Seductively whispering the lyrics of the piña colada song on Robert's ear, Clancy blacked out again.

He found himself holding a flashlight in the middle of the woods, “that's it,” Clancy thought, “I pushed his buttons too far and he left me to be eaten by the Dover Ghost.”

A grip on his arm and a hand on his mouth to muffle his scream and he could swear he pissed his pants. “Shush, we are close now,” Robert's rough voice whispered.

Oblivious, Clancy followed him to a stream, “This is where that fisherman said he saw something,” Robert stated. Clancy wanted to protest, he was too wasted to hunt cryptids.

“Did you hear that?”

“Yes, Rob, it's me pissing.” Clancy relieved himself on a tree, “before the next time you scare me and I can't hold it... God it burns.”

“Are you crazy? This is going to attract the creature,” He exclaimed, way more enthusiastically than any other time they hang together.

“Isn't that what we want?”

“No! This is just a recon mission. I'm drunk and don't have my equipment with me.”

“Well then, let's get out of here before it bites my dick off.”

They continued walking down the river, it was rather relaxing if you didn't believe the whole haunting creature thing.

“So who said what again?” Clancy broke the silence, the crickets getting so loud it felt like his brain was vibrating inside his skull.

“This fisherman was rambling about seeing a big humanoid creature near the end of this stream.”

“A drunk fisherman?” Clancy rolled his eyes and tripped for the fifth time on a twig, “This is so not a place a drunk man should be.”

“Maybe if you had less piña coladas you would be fine.”

“I had one!”

“Exactly.”

Clancy could see the sea through the trees below them, the bright spinning spotlight from the light house occasionally cast some wicked shadows that got the men on their feet. Robert seemed spellbound on his hunt.

“Robert, hold on.” Clancy placed a hand on his shoulder, “Do you feel it?”

Robert looked back at him, “What?”

“I can feel a presence among us.”

“What? What is it? A ghost? Residual energy? Did you see an orb?” He held Clancy's shuddering hand, Clancy looked over his shoulders petrified.

“Who are you? Speak!” Clancy demanded, “Oh god, oh no...”

“What is it Clancy? What do you hear?”

Clancy's eyes were fixed at the ground, “This is no common ghost! We need to get out of here, Robert!”

“A poltergeist? Is it a demon? The Dover?”

“It's... it's...” He looked deeply into Robert's eyes, he frowned, but you could see the fear behind the mean hunter facade. Clancy leaned over his ear, “It's sobriety.” He whispered.

For a moment, Robert remained motionless, his hands encircled Clancy's neck, grasping lightly, hesitating to snap the joker's neck right there. Robert shoved him back, Clancy fell against a tree behind him.

“Take this seriously, will you?” Robert yelled.

“I am! The ghost is filling my mind with thoughts of life and mortality and taxes, it's terrifying!” Robert ignored him and returned to his mindless search, “C'mon Rob! I was just joking, lighten up!”

The stream turned to the sea, they found nothing else besides a group of people around a campfire on the sand a few feet away from them.

“Now what?”

“Look!” Robert crouched before a pile of dirt.

“Tell me that's not a pile of cryptid dung.”

“No, dumbass, it's a footprint.” He shined the light on... a pile of dirt.

“I don't see it...”

“Here are the fingers,” He pointed, “One, two, three and a smaller fourth one a little lower.”

“Like a chicken.” Clancy said, but to be honest he couldn't see any footprint at all.

“Like a bird-like creature, yes...”

“So, did the guy see a humanoid creature, or a bird like creature?”

“A humanoid creature with bird feet.”

“Well, there goes my bigfoot theory.”

Robert scowled at him, “Please tell me that was a joke”

“Okay, so what do you think it is?”

“I'm not sure...” He scratched his scruffy beard, “I need to check my books.”

“Your books, back at your place? Great, let's go.”

“Let's ask those guys if they saw something.” He pointed at the group by the beach.

“Seriously? We are going to ask a bunch of teenager potheads if they saw a...” He watched Robert walk away, any other moment he would be desperate to do the opposite, but his hunter instincts were on and it would take a while to turn off.

Clancy followed him for moral support and to keep him from murdering a teenager or two.

“Hey,” Robert growled, the entire group jumped on their feet. Clancy bit a laugh, the poor guys had zits and braces and their eyes were so damn red and wide staring at the tall man before them.

“Good job, Rob. You just ruined their tripping and scarred them for life.”

“Are you the police?” A boy yelped, his voice cracked so badly that Clancy felt a pang of guilt for having a smile so malicious on his face.

Robert ignored him, he shined the light on the smaller boy with large bottle bottom glasses, the reflection off his braces blinded Clancy', “How long have you been here?”

The kid whined like a creaking door.

“We just got here, man,” The tallest boy replied, obviously hiding a bottle behind his back.

“You didn't see anything suspicious going on the woods?” Robert's voice was on that low and threatening tone that even Clancy had the creeps.

“Nah, nah, man, we were here all the time, just talking, just talking.” He let the bottle fall, the liquid leaking on the sand.

Robert shook his head and turned away.

“I'm confiscating these,” Clancy quickly grabbed a plastic bag tucked in a hole in the sand, “We're not pressing charges this time,” He winked and ran after Robert.

They walked to the street. Disappointment clearly visible in Robert's face, Clancy placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Sorry we couldn't find our birdman, but I got the next best thing!” He waved the plastic bag with two chunks of grass, “Let's hope it's not oregano!”

They meant to walk home, but like insects to a light, they stopped by a liquor store on the way and shared a bottle of liquor so foul the only reason of existence was to get people drunk as fast as possible.

Back on Robert's house, they put on classic tunes and turned up the volume.

“Oh man, this definitely doesn't smell like pizza” Clancy joked, trying to get the marijuana drug wrapped in a piece of paper while Robert looked after Betsy.

It definitely wasn't oregano.

“Puff puff pass,” Clancy giggled.

“What does that mean?”

“I don't know, I saw it in a movie, Amanda say that she didn't know either...” He paused, “I think she was lying.”

Hyped up, Clancy clumsily danced with Betsy while Robert played air guitar. They barely heard a knock on the door.

“Mr. Vega!” Clancy exclaimed and pulled the man to a hug. Hugo chuckled and patted his back, “Come rock with us!”

“I hate to be the cranky old man, Clancy.” He coughed, “But Ernest has an important test tomorrow and...”

“Ah, like sleeping well will get him a good grade,” Robert yelled from the back.

“Don't-” Clancy hiccuped, “Don't be rude, Robbie. I'll turn down the volume, Hugo, no need to call the popo.”

“I wasn't-” Hugo was interrupted by a hand on his pajamas shirt.

“Love your pajamas, is this silk? So soft.”

“Ye-yes?” He laughed nervously, “Well, thanks for being understanding. Have a goodnight.”

“Bye bye, professor.” Clancy waved like a dork.

“Party pooper,” Robert sulked when the door was closed.

“You heard the man, let's wrap this party up!”

With the neighbourhood nice and quiet, the two creatures of the night stumbled to bed for a sloppy make out session that ended up with Clancy puking on a strategically placed bucket next to Robert's bed.

“That was a millisecond away from a disaster,” Clancy laughed at his peril, “Fuck, it's really cold in here or is it just me?”

Robert stumbled to the bathroom, composed enough to reach the toilet before throwing up.

“Oh man,” Clancy slurred, “When you of all people are puking that's when I get worried.” He twisted and turned on the bed, an extremely uncomfortable tingling rushing through his spine. Meanwhile, Robert grunted and heaved in the bathroom. “Rob,” Clancy wiped the cold sweat from the back of his neck, “I don't feel too good.”

Robert sat down next to him, “Sit down,” He ordered, but Clancy had lost connection with most of his body. The man pulled the man against the headboard.

“I- I...” Clancy panted, taking a long deep breath, letting out an exhausted sigh.

“I'm getting some water for you.”

The man left the room. Clancy slid down, he could smell his vomit on the bucket, it turned a knot in his stomach, he wanted to puke again, but had no energy to do so. Robert returned with a tall glass filled with water and attempted to make his partner drink it up. Clancy coughed it out.

“I can't, I can't,” He yelped, sliding down again.

“Ah, shit...” Robert grunted, desperately searching for his pants.

Clancy's vision blurred, he could hear the little quirky steps of Betsy, see the blurred silhouette of Robert's pushing her away from the bucket while fumbling with his phone, feel small wet licks on his face. It all faded away.

“Stay with me, Clancy.” Robert grabbed his chin, “Stay with me.”

He tried chasing that voice and the high-pitched whining, but the pull was too hard, he succumbed to it and closed his eyes.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to add one more chapter since this one got too long


	3. Chapter 3

“You are enabling him, man,” Said a familiar voice, “That's dangerous.”

Clancy saw a bright orange blur in front of him, he blinked twice, Brian's face came into view. The redhead smiled fondly at him, his cheeks pink and his eyes wet.

“I dare you to wake up, sleepy head.” He said, Clancy wanted to smile and opened his eyes as wide as he could with a pompous smirk.

Behind Brian was Craig giving him a thumbs up.

“Welcome back, bro.”

“Craig?” Clancy muttered, his voice weak and raspy. Craig leaned closer with a worried expression, “Is this a good excuse to ditch gym tomorrow?”

Craig stared at him for a moment before letting out the softest chuckle, “Always skipping leg day, ain't ya bro?”

“I'm always wearing pants anyway.”

Clancy's eyes turned to the man sitting in the corner, staring down at his hands.

“Rob,” He called, the man looked at him, “Are you alright?”

“Robert here is fine,” Brian interrupted with a rather patronizing tone, “A bit of a hangover, but I'm sure he is used to it.”

Robert sulked, not daring to stare back at the bigger man.

“Don't guilt trip him,” Clancy begged, “It's my fault.”

“Well, Robert should know more than to drag you along his little adventures.” Craig stated.

Clancy never saw the always intimidating man look so small and guilty sitting on that chair, curled like a cornered small rodent.

“I'm a grown man, Craig,” Clancy intervened, “I should be able to take care of myself.”

“Well, but you aren't,” He retorted and sighed, “I knew I should've said something when I saw you two stumbling back.”

“Craig is right,” Robert stood up, “I shouldn't have invited you to drink after what you told me,” He sighed, “I didn't know what to say or what to do...”

“What did he say?” Brian asked.

“It's nothing... really.” Clancy dismissed, “I just didn't want to be alone in the house, it's so empty now...”

The three dads looked at him, Clancy wanted to dig a hole and die in it. Thankfully the doctor showed up and they all had to leave. He said something about exhaustion, dehydration, alcohol poisoning and malnutrition, turns out surviving on melted cheese for two days wasn't a good idea. Clancy had some trouble following, his eyes focused on the IV drip.

After a couple of days on observation, with lots of visits and angry, upsetting calls from Amanda, Clancy returned home. Craig and Brian took turns babysitting him, a humiliating but ultimately humbling experience, Craig made sure he was healthy and hydrated while Brian fed him nutritionally balanced meals to regain the staggering amount of weight he lost on the 2 day binge.

“If you were so lonely, you should have called us,” Craig placed a hand on his shoulder, “You know I'm here for you, bro.” Clancy smiled, the intentions were good, but things weren't that simple.

He didn't see Robert for a week, not sure if his friends were keeping him away or Robert himself was avoiding him, probably both. The man didn't answer any of his texts either. Alone one night, Clancy sneaked out to find his drinking partner at his usual spot on Jim and Kim's, looking gloomier than ever, eyes set down on his drink, his usually imposing posture now meek and burdened.

Mary sat beside him, looking at Clancy with a toneless expression, she had visited him with Joseph, but didn't say a word, Clancy didn't blame her. Unsure of what to do, he sat at the counter, eyes glancing back at Mary, begging her to break the ice.

Neil approached him, from the way the bartender looked at him, Clancy knew that he knew, Craig or Brian were expecting this to happen and warned him, how embarrassing.

“Hi Neil,” he stuttered, “A cranberry juice, please.”

The bartender smiled kindly. Clancy fought the urge to leave, it seemed like the entire bar knew already. Mary sat next to him, taking a sip of wine. “Go to him.” She didn't have to say anything else, Clancy took his glass and walked to the booth.

“Mind if I sit down?” He asked, Robert nodded without taking his eyes off his glass. Clancy sat across the table. The silence made agonizingly uncomfortable when a table burst into singing happy birthday. “I hope Craig and Brian didn't give you a bad time.” Silence, Clancy's hands hesitated to reach out for Robert, “It wasn't your fault.” Robert groaned, took a sip of his whiskey and wiped his lips on his sleeve. “So, anything new going on?” Clancy asked, twiddling his thumbs, hoping small talk could get some reaction, whatever it may be.

“I'm going to see Val this weekend,” Robert surprised him, Clancy had to lean forward to hear him over the boisterous crowd.

“That's great! How are things going between you two?” Clancy bit his lips, a pang of guilt hit his stomach, how long had it been since the last time they talked about her? Robert kept so much to himself it was up to Clancy to get through him.

“It's been fine,” Robert interrupted his thoughts with his usual dismissive behaviour, but that didn't fly with Clancy anymore and he knew that, “She keeps one foot out the door, but I can't blame her...” he swallowed a sob.

Clancy felt his heart crack, “I'm sure things will be alright in time,” His hand finally reached out to hold Robert's own, a thumb softly caressing the tattoo that remained a mystery to him, “the important thing is that you're trying...”

“Not hard enough...” Robert slowly moved his hand away.

“Then try harder.”

“Easy to say,” He muttered and sulked back on the chair.

“It is,” Clancy raised his voice, “If you stop being so stubborn about yourself and your damaged goods bullshit.”

Robert frowned, anyone else would be getting a punch to the face, Clancy slowly wet his lips with the juice to show the angry man that he was untouchable.

“She keeps a foot out the door because you do,” He continued, “because you are too busy brooding and trying to justify yourself thinking she will reject you. It's only holding both of you back.”

Clancy's phone buzzed, Craig asking where he was. Clancy replied honestly, “At the pub talking some sense into Robert, don't worry, not drinking.”

“Your baby sitters?”

“My friends worried about me,” Clancy spat, “I'm not stupidly proud, I can admit that I need some help.” He set the phone down and glanced back at Robert, a frown to let him know he wasn't done, “I'm going to an AA meeting tomorrow morning, I want you to come with me.”

Robert scoffed at the “joke”.

“See? That's the kind of attitude that is fucking up your life.”

Clancy caught the sight of Robert's fists trembling and it only encouraged him more, he might leave the pub with a black eye, but a point made.

“If you don't want to go with me, fine, but go some other time. This is important. It's obvious neither of us have any self control, we'll have to carry each other through this.”

No answer, but the expression on Robert's face was of conflict and anger, he reached out for his glass to find it empty. Across the bar, Mary was whispering on some guy's ear, “Maybe we can even bring Mary along.”

“I don't think AA is the kind of therapy she needs.”

They looked at her, a heartbreaking sight, she saw them and smirked, but there was no way to hide the sadness in her eyes.

More people entered the bar, gathering at the birthday man's table. Robert grunted, a sign that he was ready to bar hop.

“Do you wanna spend the night at my place?” Clancy interrupted, “We can eat some ice cream and watch stupid shows on TV.” Clancy put on his biggest, kindest smile. A hard sell for Robert, but he hoped the man loved him enough to accept it.

It took him a while, but Robert nodded. Clancy drove them back to the cul-de-sac, stopping at Robert's house for Betsy first, of course. With two large pots of ice cream and two big spoons, they settled on the sofa with a thick blanket, Betsy curled in between, and a over the top reality show that, every five minutes, required someone throwing a drink on someone else's face.

Clancy leaned against his partner, holding him tight when he started to get agitated, kissing him when his lips got dry, whispering soothing words when the thoughts in his head got too loud, until he finally lulled him to sleep. Clancy turned the TV off, the only sound was the comforting snore from Betsy.

Tomorrow they would take a step on the right direction, together, leaning on each other like they did when they were drunk stumbling on the way home.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was a pain to write, I apologize for any grammar mistake, but I can't keep fixing it. I went back to fix some mistakes I did on earlier chapters too, nothing too big, mostly redundancies.   
> I hope you enjoyed this last chapter, might write some more dream daddy if I have the time.   
> Thank you all so much for the support ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Ao3 formatting is weird and I'll never understand it


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